Mindly Different

Many people with sensory sensitivity have heard this advice countless times:
“You’ll get used to it”
“Just expose yourself more”
“Your tolerance will increase if you push through”

This idea is often offered with good intentions. It comes from a belief that the nervous system works like a muscle: stress it, repeat the exposure, and eventually it adapts. And in some cases, for some nervous systems, that can be true. But for many sensitive or neurodivergent brains, repeated forced exposure doesn’t lead to adaptation. It leads to overload.

This isn’t a personal failure. It’s physiology.

Habituation vs. Sensitization: Two Very Different Outcomes

In neuroscience, habituation refers to the brain’s ability to reduce its response to a repeated, non-threatening stimulus. This is what happens when you stop noticing the ticking of a clock or the hum of a refrigerator.
But there is another process, less talked about and often misunderstood: sensitization.
Sensitization occurs when repeated exposure to a stimulus makes the nervous system more reactive, not less. Instead of dampening the signal, the brain amplifies it.

Sensitive nervous systems are more prone to sensitization, especially when:

• the stimulus is intense or unpredictable
• the person has limited control over exposure
• the brain is already under stress or fatigue
• past experiences have taught the nervous system that similar stimuli are unsafe

In these cases, the brain doesn’t learn “this is fine”.
It learns “pay closer attention”.

Why Forced Exposure Often Backfires

The brain’s primary job is not comfort – it is survival.

When a sensitive nervous system is repeatedly pushed into overwhelming environments (noise, social demands, sensory chaos, emotional pressure), the brain may interpret this not as harmless repetition, but as ongoing threat.

This leads to changes at multiple levels:

• Increased amygdala reactivity, heightening vigilance and emotional intensity
• Reduced prefrontal regulation, making it harder to filter, prioritize, and calm the response
• Heightened sensory cortex activation, amplifying perception rather than dampening it

Instead of “getting used to it”, the nervous system becomes more alert, more exhausted, and more reactive.

Allostatic Load: The Cost of Pushing Through

Every nervous system has a limited energy budget.
Allostatic load refers to the cumulative wear and tear on the body and brain caused by chronic stress and repeated adaptation demands.
For sensitive nervous systems, forced exposure often adds to this load rather than reducing it.

Over time, this can show up as:

• chronic fatigue
• migraines or headaches
• irritability or emotional volatility
• sensory intolerance that worsens rather than improves
• shutdown, dissociation, or burnout

The brain isn’t refusing to adapt.
It’s signaling that the cost has become too high.

Stress-Induced Plasticity: When the Brain Learns the Wrong Lesson

Neuroplasticity is often presented as universally positive. But plasticity simply means change – not all change is beneficial.

Under chronic stress, the brain adapts by:

• strengthening threat-detection pathways
• prioritizing speed over nuance
• reducing flexibility in favor of predictability

This is known as stress-induced plasticity.

If exposure happens in a state of overwhelm, fear, or depletion, the brain doesn’t learn tolerance. It learns avoidance, hypervigilance, or collapse.
This is why pushing through sensory pain, social exhaustion, or cognitive overload often makes future exposure harder – not easier.

Sensitivity Is Not a Lack of Resilience

A sensitive nervous system is not weak. It is highly responsive.
It detects changes, inconsistencies, and intensity with greater accuracy. That sensitivity can support creativity, empathy, insight, and deep processing – but it also means the margin for overload is smaller.
True adaptation for sensitive brains rarely comes from force.
It comes from safety, pacing, and choice.

What Actually Supports Adaptation

For sensitive nervous systems, nervous system learning happens best when:

• exposure is gradual and voluntary, not imposed
• the person has control and exit options
• recovery is built in, not earned
• signals of overload are respected early
• safety and predictability are present

This allows the brain to update its predictions:
“I can handle this, and I’m not trapped”.
That is how real tolerance develops – not through endurance, but through trust.

A Different Question to Ask

Instead of asking:
“How can I get used to this?”
It may be more helpful to ask:
“What does my nervous system need to feel safe enough to engage?”

For sensitive brains, accommodation is not avoidance.
It is the foundation that allows engagement to happen at all.

Your nervous system is not broken. It is responding exactly as it was designed to – with precision, memory, and care.

Listening to it is not giving up to your weakness.
It is learning how to work with your biology instead of against it.

By Nataliya Popova
Mindly Different – Coaching for the beautifully different mind